Falling, by Wang Di
with voices chanting inside me
that tells me that
I should never allow the light
to fall upon me?
deep within me,
trying to rewire
all the veins that I have cut,
all the connections that I have lost,
all the memories that seem to wither
into an abyss but
I am tired of all the mending
just to keep myself sane.
Mama told me to carry a silver plated coin
for the loneliness to subside.
Now, as I walk along
this pitch black pavement with
her gift in my pocket,
I crave for the synchronicity of
my dreams with reality,
to become
all of these faces that are around me,
different hues of yellow, red and green,
each one with
a different joy,
a different dream
and with a completely different
ability to find
solace in the agitation.
held hostage in my own mind,
spending countless hours in the bathroom,
my movements unable to resonate
with the direction of the compass
yet, here I am
trying to find the serenity for everyone.
all the mess that I create,
every second.
God damn I am falling hard
and back into the place that I didnโt wish for.
So, when am I going to get my happy ending?
๐ ๐ข๐ฎ ๐ง๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ,
๐ ๐ข๐ฎ ๐ง๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ.
When You Left Me
When You Left Me, by Wang Di
on the other side of our favorite beach,
I walked inside an eerie room,
plethora of mirrors around me,
touched the shiniest of all
and became one myself.
Now that you arenโt here
to hold my hand like you used to,
these mirrors showcases
the metamorphosis of
this home for my disdained soul
from an authentic self
into an unknown being,
who once was in need of
continuous validation of
suiting oneself into
those ideal standards
that honey, you seemed to have
fallen for me in the first place.
is all you could say
when my arms were wide open
for you but
you walked past your home
and entered into a new dimension
without me in it;
without me.
lying on the shelf,
loneliness befriending him,
I couldnโt help myself
but to hold him for 3 seconds
and bury it
under a colossal of hurricanes.
when you went
to the other side of our favorite beach,
I couldnโt get myself together,
still canโt.
I am looking at myself in this mirror,
can only see the blueness
encompassing it;
could be the sky above
for a new fledge of wings
or the ocean,
the siren who kept on singing
for eons.
